1. |
Always Leaving
05:47
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I got to know you
Or at least I thought I did
I mean who were you really
When I looked up to you as a kid
You said you that felt my pain
But then you split before the grieving
Why oh why are people always leaving
Why oh why are people always leaving
I tried to love you
But you would not let me in
You kept me at a distance
Like a vestigial twin
You lied to me so sweetly
And I wanted to go on believing
Why oh why are people always leaving
Why oh why are people always leaving
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2. |
Highway 46 Revisited
04:49
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I was going to see my girlfriend
She lived up in Santa Cruz
I was on a midnight drive
Driving like I had nothing to lose
I popped some dexedrine
Just to keep me awake
I guess I took a little too much
'Cause it made me start to shake, shake, shake
Then I saw a big old semi coming at me in my lane
He ran me right off the road
For reasons that I still can't explain
It was somewhere in-between
The Lost Hills and Paso Robles
That I did get my final kicks
My old car it spun like a dervish
And wound up deep down in a ditch
Way out on Highway 46
My car, well, it flipped and rolled
And it landed upside-down
It all seemed to happen in slo-mo
In a haze of yellow and brown
I remember I said to myself,
Hey, well, this is it
This is how my life will end
Holy shit
But then the dust did settle
And I got myself out
I looked at my mangled car and thought
I should've died in there no doubt
I was lucky I didn't die
I still wonder why, why, why, why didn't I
Since then nothing's been the same
And I gotta wonder
Maybe this is the Twilight Zone
And I'm really six feet under
Well maybe I didn't survive and I'm in hell
Maybe that's why the world's so strange
It's hard to tell
They say that Jimmy Dean he died here
Trying to get his kicks
Maybe somewhere he's written a song
About Highway 46
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3. |
Are We There Yet?
03:35
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We hopped into the station wagon
Headed out for our Sunday drive
I sat between my sisters
Couldn't wait for us to arrive
Are we there yet, well soon we'll be
Just don't rush it
Keep yourself fancy free
Are we there yet, well it's around the bend
Just over yonder
Our little trip will end
We went to get ourselves some ice cream
And then we got ourselves a flat
My dad and I we tried to fix it
He chewed his chaw and then he spat
We always had ourselves a real good time
We fought and sang to the radio
We didn't give a hoot where we were going
Just as long as we did go
This is the way I like to think of us
When I think of us at all
Me, my sisters and my mom and dad
Back when the world was so small
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4. |
Homesick
05:55
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I got a longing
A longing in my heart
I got a longing
And it's tearing me apart
It has dogged me
Dogged me every day
I can't shake it
Much to my dismay
Yeah this longing
Hurts so bad
This longing just makes me sad
'Cause I am homesick
Homesick for you
Homesick
Don't know what to do
You see every time I come back
There's no one there
No one there to greet me
Yeah, nobody cares
I am homesick, homesick
Homesick for you
I got an ache
An ache down in my guts
I take Pepto Bismol
But it still drives me nuts
Nothing seems to quell it
Or make it go away
I gotta feeling
It's here till my dying day
Yeah this nausea
It makes me sick
Nothing, nothing does the trick
Nobody says
C'mon home, baby
C'mon home, c'mon hom
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5. |
Impossible
04:36
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No matter how I look at it
No matter how I try
I’m never gonna get what I need
I can scream
And I can fret
And I can rip wide open and bleed
It’s impossible
Yeah it’s impossible
Don’t need a weathervane
To know which way the wind blows
It is impossible
Impossible
The impossibility of crows
Impossible, impossible
I can go through therapy
And I can seek a higher truth
But in the end I’m left with who I am
I can write a song
So I can make it clear
But the world it just don’t give a damn
I wish that I were a believer
But I know it’s all a lie
I can build a monument
With my own two hands
And stand back and wonder at all
I can learn the steps
To your favorite song
But first I gotta learn how to crawl
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6. |
Transcontinental Highway
04:57
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Started out on 42nd Street
Headed for that big ol' brown Hudson
Crossed over New Jersey way
Bounded southwestward to Princeton
Made it down to Philadelphia
Then west across to Ohio
Took Route 30 through Illinois
Wended our way to Iowa
We're travelin' up and down and all around
Through a big and small and midsize town
On that transcontinental highway
Well you and me and the kid makes three
We're hap-hap-happy as can be
On that transcontinental highway
Moved on to Columbus, NE
Gassed up that good ol' T-Bone Truck Stop
Picked up a K.D. Lang CD
With some sliders, some French fries and a soda pop
Sped along through Granger, Wyoming
Got a ticket from Erik Estrada
He winked and sent us on our merry way
As we went up to Sierra Nevada
Look at all them crazy license plates
From every state in our big ol' crazy nation
It's all one giant shopping mall
Thank God for civilization
Climbed our way up a steep incline
Thought we'd almost run out of gas
Scooted along old U.S. Route 4-0
'Cross that fabled Donner Pass
Stopped to get a big bag of pork rinds
Then onward we flew through Sacramento
Picked up a hippie in Berkeley
Reached our end in San Francisco
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7. |
This One's for the Baby
04:56
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It was 25 years ago
And I was just itching to move
I knew if I stayed right where I was
I’d never get out of my groove
But then as it happened
The rabbit suddenly died
And instead of feeling blessed
I was horrified
This one’s for the baby
The baby we never had
This one’s for the baby
I’ll never not feel sad
This one’s for the baby
The baby we never made
B-A-B-Y
The memory it won’t fade
I planned to move to Boston
I was desperate to change my life
I’d had about all I could stand
Every day was storm and strife
But then you called me
And I freaked out like a jerk
You cried your holy head off
While I went berserk
You won’t ever forgive me and I won’t ever forgive me
No one gets forgiven, baby, oh baby
It’s been 25 years now
And here we are on the rocks
We can’t move forward
And we can’t turn back the clocks
You have never absolved me
And frankly neither have I
Here we live side by side
And turn a blind eye
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8. |
The Big Lie
05:25
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I didn't know who I was, didn't have a single clue
So I tried to be more than what I thought
I should be to you
I changed the way that I dressed, I adopted a different pose
I remember you asked me where
I got my clothes, I so wanted to prove myself
Wanted to be your number one
You liked me because you thought that I was so much fun
Well I wrote it all down and it sounded so good
I used verbs and nouns just the best that I could
And I made it all up, made it all up
For you, for you, for you, for you
Well you read it all through and it sounded so fine
All our stars in the sky well they seemed to align
But I made it all up, made it all up
For you, for you, for you, for you
We would go out on the town, we would go to fancy affairs
We'd dance and sing and carry on with our fancy airs
People looked up to like a queen and I was your little king
Even though none of it meant any fucking goddamn thing
I loved to play along and you so loved your part
I guess that's why we were doomed from the start
I made it all up, I’ll admit it
I am the one who went and did it, did it, did it
I made it all up, I won't deny it
But you were the one who would buy it
I didn't know who I was, didn't have a single clue
So I went made a life that resembled something true
You went right along with it all
You implied that it was OK
Who are we but a figment or phantom anyway
We couldn't be happier, no need to wonder why
What does it matter if it's all really just a lie
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9. |
You Will Find a Home
04:46
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Sometimes it seems
The whole wide world is against you
And there ain't no one, no one on your side
Well don't lose faith when you're at the bottom
'Cause you will find, you will find a home
Well don't be so down
So down and so doomy
Better to be doughty and laugh at your fears
Yeah I know the whole wide world is depressing
But you will find, you will find a home
Lift yourself up, lift yourself up
Lift up off of the ground
Get yourself out, get yourself out
Get out of town
And when you do you will see
That you are not alone, no, no
And you will find, you will find home
Well don't look so lost
So lost and pathetic
I am here, here right by your side
And when it seems
You can't go no further
Well you're dead wrong
You will find a home, you will find a home
And when it seems you can't go no further
And when it seems you can't go no further
You will find a home
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10. |
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I know you think that I don’t know you
And maybe, just maybe that’s true
But deep down inside there’s a connection
That bonds us like super glue
Never not ever not gonna love you
That’s the way it has to be
Never not ever not gonna love you
You and me, yeah you and me
You and me, yeah you and me
Something happens when I look into your eyes
And I wonder if it’s the same for you
That no matter how impossible it may be
There’s always this sense of deja vu
You and me, yeah you and me
You and me for all eternity
I can feel the rhythm of your heartbeat
I see the tear in the corner of your eye
You can’t tell me I don’t move you
You can’t tell me it's some kind of lie
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11. |
I Gotta Wonder
04:11
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I'm looking closely but I can’t believe it
There's a light that shines and I try to receive it
The message is vague
I must decipher
I have no choice
I am a lifer
And that’s not all, that's not all
There's the wonder, the wonder of it all
I gotta wonder at the wonder of it all
I gotta wonder at the wonder of it all
It ain’t about me, no
It ain’t about you
What's unreal and what is true
Who's to say and who's to now
But I gotta wonder, I just can't let it go
When I look inside I'm taken aback
Not much light in here, mostly it’s black
I write it all down
What I see and feel
My small hope I can make it real
And that’s not all
That's not all
There's the wonder, the wonder of it all
When I look back it seems so vague
But the hurt hangs on like the plague
Can’t let it go try as I might
Still I write it all down lke a neophyte
But that's not all
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12. |
Time to Come On Home
06:20
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You been out there
Running around for so long
You lost your way
Not even all those breadcrumbs
You left will help you to get back OK
But sooner or later you got to make your way
Down the road
And when you do
When you do
You can drop your heavy load
It is time to come on home
It's time to come on home
You got dropped like a busy line
When they had enough of your stuff
I guess you never got handed the word
When they said, Enough is enough
But now's the time to make your amends
And get together
With your kith and your kin
They're the ones who will take you back
Take you back
From where you been
Weren't you the guy who changed his name
And never gave a reason why
Weren't you the guy who turned his back on us all
And never bothered to say goodbye
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The Revenants Boston, Massachusetts
"It was hell," recalls former child.
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