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My Heart Is a Cathedral

by The Revenants

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1.
Yeah I know it's near the end Yeah the end is 'round the bend You better handle your affairs You know what they say about old gray mares Time to pack it in, Billie Put all your stuff away Time to pack it in, Billie It's the end of your day I can say I'm glad I knew you Wish I spent more time next to you We are having a last round Before they put you in the ground No time for crying in our beer Look out the end is really here Better say what we need to say Before God takes you away
2.
I wasn't present for my first forty years I just cruised right along But then when my dad and mom passed away I thought something might be wrong Why have I waited so long I had to get with the program Do something that wasn't just shit Make something out of my so-called life Do something lickety split But I could not commit 'Cause I was stone out of my mind Did not know what I was doing Stone out of my mind These strange pursuits I am pursuing I was stone out of my mind Stone out of my mind One day I went to see the doctor Told me my blood pressure's through the roof He handed me my electrocardiogram Said, Do you need any further proof My old brain it went poof I finally went and had a heart attack And I barely pulled myself through All these crazy old-man issues What's an old man supposed to do Is this what my life has come to 'Cause I'll be stone out of my mind I know now just what I am doing Stone out of my mind These strange pursuits I love pursuing I was stone out of my mind Stone out of my mind
3.
I bleed real blood Red as a your lips It gushes out of me In Technicolor strips Can't hold it back It is out of control That's the way that it is When you're a slave to your soul My heart is a cathedral The holiest of hosts So gothic and so hallowed And filled up with ghosts My heart is a cathedral Where the bells ring true And I need to fill it with you I feel real pain From my head to my toes It's always with me Always will be I suppose I pray for relief But God does not hear He must be too busy To lend me His ear I feel a twinge All down my old spine Like something has grabbed me And now nothing will align I'm beat down and busted Like a broken old bird I kneel at your altar But I don't hear a word
4.
I don't trust him and why should you I mean, look at all the trouble he's caused We cross ourselves and genuflect We obey every one of his laws We get baptized and eat fish on Fridays We follow all his sacraments We do his bidding and fight his wars We rid ourselves of discontents We live out all of his commandments We never steal, covet and/or kill We try not to take his good name in vain We know he has just so much goodwill I don't like him, never have He has made my life a living hell And those I know who choose to live without him Their lives seem pretty darn swell We sacrifice, give up for lent We tithe, we pray and we confess And we defend him to the nonbelievers when they say that all he does is repress We do our best to spread the word until every man alive sings his praise We kiss his ass and shine his shoes We follow all of his crazy ways And after our pain and suffering And after all of our goddamn work Why oh why is God a goddamn jerk Such a goddamn jerk I don't trust him and there's a reason He cannot seem to make up his mind Does he want us to forge our own path Does he want us to follow him blind We weed out all of the heathen We cast them down into the fire We live a life of sacrifice We rid ourselves of earthly desire
5.
Little Cloud 05:13
Float along you little cloud Got no worries Got no cares Blow on you little cloud No one sees you They are unawares Blow 'round and 'round and 'round Roll on you little cloud Bang some thunder Electrify Spread it out you little cloud Dark the sun Blanket the sky Whirl, whirl, whirl you little cloud Whip up a storm Muss up some hair Drift on you little cloud No one can touch you You are not there
6.
My kid and I got off of the subway And we started to cross the street When suddenly a car came plowing through And nearly knocked us right off our feet The driver was on her cellphone And she flew right on by I screamed, "Hey watch where you're going" And she gave me the evil eye Well my kid took me by the hand Said I'm here and I understand And everything is gonna work out fine And I believed her with all my heart And all my anger well it fell apart And I said, hey the pleasure is mine Well the woman she drove on her way When I heard a man clearly out of his tree He said, hey you get out of the street And I realized he shouting at me Right then and there I sort of lost it I wanted to tear him limb from limb But my kid she looked me square in the eye and said I'm really glad that you're not him She said walk away She said walk away from here Don't give him what he wants Well I stood there and shook my head And I said, You just can't win for losing My kid said, That may be so It all depends on the path that you are choosing
7.
We dance in the fields On a hot summer night I sing in your ear While mosquitoes do bite And what do we care You throw back your hair And you say Oh how I love you That's the name of the tune We can sing it forever Under this here blood moon Your cheeks are ablaze And your dress is on fire Your heart's gonna burst From all your pent-up desire You kick off your shoes And toss off your blues And you cry We hang on to each other Hang with all our might We hang on to each other We make everything all right We walk these old streets From Bay Ridge to Bed Stuy With stars in our pockets And that blood moon in the sky Tomorrow and tomorrow All the time we can borrow And we sing
8.
I am division I am derision I am that street of broken dreams I'm ripping at the seems I'm the monster on the prowl The screech of the hoot owl The barbarian at the gate Vomiting out his hate I am division I am derision I am me I am you I am hiding in the alley I tell ya, hey I'm your best pally I supply you with your drug Then I pull out the rug I am nothing but a thug I am division Head-on collision I am me I am you I am division I make an incision I cut you right down the middle Like cakes on the griddle I am your best mate I tell you that you're great It's what you want to hear Stoke your ego and your fear I am division I make an incision I am me I am you I am that howl in the night I blow out each and every candlelight I'm your nightmare unrelieved Aggressor and aggrieved I am your very own pet peeved I am division Strike with precision I am me I am you
9.
You see her and you want her And you will for the rest of your days She sees you and she wants you And she understands all of your ways She folds into you like pages in a book Just the way she holds onto your every word It's in her soul and it's in her look It's in the way her love is transferred You hold her and you kiss her And you say it will be all right You lay with her like two halves of a whole You do it each and every night We live in a world where nothing seems to work And no one really gets you But when I see the way her body lies with yours I see someone who really fits you You feel her and she moves you Nothing like your love for one another She feels you and you move her She's your girl and you are her mother
10.
No Change 05:17
He felt so nice and sleepy So he laid down on his bed He dropped into his dream world He never moved his head He dreamed beyond forever In a place outside of time More colors than the rainbow The steak it is sublime There will never be no change Never, no how There will never be no change Not ever, not now She does all of his laundry She makes him tea and scones He doesn't want to leave his bed Or have to move his bones The sun is at the window The paper's in the yard Let them pile up till tomorrow Says this big ol' tub of lard This is his own story This is how it went One day he was vital The next day he was spent This is his own story It could be yours too Just how you choose to spend your days Well it's all up to you
11.
Needed so bad to get away Got what we wanted and whole lot more It's a new Independence Day Hey oh it's the new world See the new world and what it's got in store Hey oh it's the new world The new world you've been waiting for Got ourselves a new flag Along with a fresh, bright coat of arms They may not be as nice as the old ones But they still have their charms We really hated the old ways And what the old ways mean Time for us to make a sea change Time to wipe the slate clean We're gonna take to the streets We're gonna tear down the walls We got our banners and slogans We got the farts by the balls We got our indignation We got our raison d'être We got God our side We got blood and sweat Sick and tired of the old boss Stick him in the guillotine Time to meet the new boss Time to build a new machine
12.
Brighter 05:44
What am I doing here Gotta know, gotta know What is the meaning of this The seeds I sow Where is it all leading to I wanna care, I wanna care How will it all work out Will it wind up fair It will be brighter Some day, some way It will be brighter Some way, some day Why should I bother What's the point, what's the point People trash the planet It's a messed up joint Will I make a difference Who's to say, who's to say Will things get any better I hope and pray It is gonna be brighter Much brighter than it's been It is gonna be brighter Brighter without and within And I will find that all my dreams Are merely windows for me to see through And I will find that all my dreams Are really dreams come true

about

My heart is a cathedral
The holiest of hosts
So gothic and so hallowed
And filled up with ghosts
My heart is a cathedral
Where the bells ring true
And I need to fill it with you

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released November 13, 2023

Cover "My Heart Is a Cathedral" by Eliot Wilder

Songs written and performed by Eliot Wilder

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The Revenants Boston, Massachusetts

"It was hell," recalls former child.

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