Where is my hammer
Where is my hacksaw
Where is my vice
Get out of my way
Let me fix it
Don’t need no advice
Where is that hatchet
Where are those pliers
Where is my monkey wrench
I can get this
Won’t fuck this up
Please excuse my French
Snip, snip here
Buzz, buzz there
And a couple of tra-la-las
Dang blast it
Where is my chainsaw
Where is my anvil
Where’s my electric drill
The dryer’s busted
The heat has failed
Life ain’t no daffodil
Where is my scraper
Where is my axe
Where’s my trusty screwdriver
I can do this
I know how
I’m a survivor
Snip, snip here
Buzz, buzz there
And a couple of tra-la-las
Dang blast it
Where are my washers
Where are my screws
Where’s my soldering gun
I'm pretty handy
I’m Mister Fixit
My idea of fun
Where are my bolts
Where are my nuts
Where’s my circular saw
There is a task
You sort it out
Like a jigsaw
Snip, snip here
Buzz, buzz there
And a couple of tra-la-las
Dang blast it
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